The Untold Pressures When Writing
Writing should never be considered a waste of time. Writing is an outlet, a unique trait that can be thrived upon by anyone who has a passion for the craft.
Ever since I was little, I always kept a journal. I would either write stories, songs, talk about my day, draw… you name it. It was always so easy, so fluent and natural for me to put the pencil to paper. There was never any pressure as a kid to write, unless as an assignment for school. Which even then, I still enjoyed it.
The first time I experienced pressure when writing is when I started keeping a journal for the sake of wanting to read it when I am older. I started to feel obligated within myself to write story long entries every day, and it soon enough seemed like a chore. So, I stopped writing. And I did not pick up a notebook again to freelance write for what seemed like over a year.
That applied pressure was internal, I did it to myself. And I hated myself for it, because I had the mentality that “what is the point?” So, I just let it go and didn’t do what I loved anymore, write.
Then I took English college courses in high school and was forced to write paper after paper. It sparked my interest in reading and analyzing a book or story for its deeper meaning and speak on my findings through paper. I loved it, and I started naturally writing more again.
I kept a journal again. I wrote in my iPhone’s notes all the time, and I believe I felt an overall change in mood. Journaling is the way I express and let out my emotions, so making sure to apply no pressure to myself to write daily was the first step I took when starting back up. I wanted to write for me. And I wanted to write about things in my personal journal that I wanted to write about, without fear that it may be embarrassing for someone to see. Because guess what, no one is going to see.
Blocking out this pressure and bad habit of forcing myself to write has opened a new outlet for me, a blog. I am posting everyday of October for Blogtober, which may sound contradicting to the point I just made, but I enjoy writing every day. I have gained a base of following that enjoys what I put on the internet, and I get to promote other bloggers and authors as well.
But it all falls back to the pressures of gaining that following, finding ideas people will enjoy, posting enough to keep people from waiting, creating a foundation as enjoyable as the blog next to me under the search bar.
These self-narrated thoughts create the internal pressures for writing, and I have learned that they need to be blocked out. Especially if I want to write a novel in November. There are so many famous and successful authors, but they are all perceived different to each individual reader. So, I am not going to let the self-perceived threat of not producing a “good enough” book stop me from creating the story in the first place!
Internal pressures when writing is like building blocks that are easy to build up, and hard to break down when done so enough. That is why you need to make sure you keep track of your thoughts, and do not let those thoughts of inferiority consume you. I let it consume me, and in the moment, it created such bad habits in both my writing and reading. But it also caused a breakthrough, which is why I am sharing this rant with you today. If you are not a writer, it may seem melodramatic of me to say I fell into a pit of uselessness with my writing, but that is exactly what a writer’s block is. I wall in the road, appear out of thin air.
But that wall is produced by you, and you can prevent it from ever appearing.
The only way to do this is to protect your mind and avoid those internal pressures. The thoughts that want you to give up or fail. It is not worth it.
But it is. Every word written, every post posted, every query submitted, accepted or rejected it is all worth it. The journey creates much more satisfaction than the actual destination.